Self - Evaluation

Time can be both a friend and an enemy.

Its been a while since I have written anything and as I walked down memory lane and read through all the things I have written on this blog I can only say much has changed since then.

Most of the things I write about is how I pity myself for not ever finding someone who will love me, but now I know that this is something that we should not rush.

Yesterday, I had someone read my palm, something that I've been very skeptical about for the longest time. A friend referred me to him, and I've learned things about myself that I have been trying to avoid and suppress for the longest time. He said that I was sensitive and I tend to feel things at a more emotional level than others. Most people see me as someone who is rude, inconsiderate and conceited, but I'm just misunderstood.


I have a tendency to only hear things that I want to hear. not really getting the message itself, and that makes me stubborn. Most of the time I let my emotions control me and because of that I make rash and irrational decisions, he was right. I never really knew that about myself, I just thought just by making these decisions it would make me feel better when in fact I'm just trying to run away from my problems and that never turns out well since no matter how far you run, you can never hide from your past not unless you choose to face it. 

Things have been rough for the past month and a half and I'm just thankful that I had the support of friends. Friends, who I have been estranged with for years and family members who i dont really get to have contact with.

James, thank you for being you. You have taught me a lot of things then and now. You and Shaun have been an inspiration to me. Things may not be perfect, but they can work. 

Yvette, Seeing you was amazing! 7 years is a long time and knowing that we still have that friendship that we had from before overwhealms me.

Mikah, even if you are a bitch sometimes You were and will always be my bitch. :-)

Angkay, what can I say... after 8 years of friendship somehow we are still the crazy people that we were.

Kuya Ernel, Although we may not see eye to eye at most times I know that you only want what is best for me and how I can straighten out my life like the way you did yours. 

Mom, you made mistakes when you were younger and at most times, I hated you for it, but learning from those mistakes made me a better person. I promise to give you a better life. 

and Most importantly... 

Josh, please stop pitying yourself. Happiness is not all about understanding how the world works and finding love. Stop worrying too much. People come and go and just remember to take your experiences to heart and grow along the way. Stop hating yourself for things you did not do and most importantly always remember that You are perfect..

Happy new year. :-)